Chikhalgaon was a sleepy little village nestled between two hills and a mango orchard, known for its mud roads, gossip-loving residents, and the annual “Gav Daawat” – the grand village feast where even the cows dressed better than most city folks.
But this year, something unprecedented happened. Something so scandalous that it brought the entire village to a halt.
It all began with a goat.
Not just any goat. She was Rani – the pride and joy of Appa Patil, the self-declared headman of Chikhalgaon (despite having lost five consecutive panchayat elections). Rani wasn’t just a goat – she was an Instagram star (thanks to Appa’s tech-savvy nephew), wore a red bow on her head, and was known for kicking anyone who dared touch her without consent. She was also the centerpiece of the Gav Daawat biryani, which was already being promoted via WhatsApp forwards.
And on the morning of the fair, Rani disappeared.
Scene One: The Discovery
Appa Patil stormed into the village square like a man possessed. “RANI GAYAB AAHE!” he screamed, waving a half-eaten banana in one hand and Rani’s empty leash in the other.
The village erupted. Women dropped their bhakris, children abandoned their cricket games, and Pandu, the paan stall owner, nearly swallowed an entire gutkha packet in shock.
“How can a goat vanish?” asked Savita Maushi, the neighborhood detective who once solved the case of the missing pressure cooker lid (it was under her bed).
“She was there at 6 AM,” Appa shouted. “I went to get her ready with coconut oil massage. I return at 6:15… gone!”
“It’s an inside job!” declared Pandu, who had recently watched four episodes of Crime Patrol.
Scene Two: The Suspects
The list of suspects grew faster than the number of TikTok reels Savita Maushi had saved for later. Appa suspected:
- Kaka Kumbhar – His neighbor who hated Rani’s morning bleating.
- Lalu the Butcher – Known to bribe animals with bananas before accidentally turning them into mutton.
- Suresh Electricwala – Who once stepped on Rani’s tail and swore revenge in front of 12 witnesses.
An emergency panchayat was called at the temple courtyard.
Kaka Kumbhar was the first to defend himself. “I am a vegetarian. I have nightmares if someone even mentions curry leaf.”
Lalu the Butcher looked nervous. “I swear on my knife, I didn’t touch her. She was like a daughter to me. A very tasty-looking daughter… but still!”
Everyone gasped. Suspicion thickened like the village dal.
Just then, a shriek echoed through the square.
It was Radha, the milkmaid. “I saw a goat tied behind the old well near the banyan tree!”
The crowd ran like kids spotting an ice cream truck.
Scene Three: The Fake Rani
They reached the well and sure enough, there stood a goat.
But it wasn’t Rani. This one was bald. Rani had beautiful curls that even Rekha would envy.
Appa squinted. “Yeh Rani nahi hai. This is… someone’s impostor goat!”
The villagers murmured. Was this an elaborate plot? A goat double?
“Why would anyone replace a goat with another goat?” asked Bhiku, the sweetshop owner.
“To mess with Appa’s reputation!” whispered Savita Maushi dramatically.
As tension soared, Panchu Painter stepped forward. “Wait, I have CCTV footage!”
Everyone gasped. “We have CCTV?”
“No,” he said proudly, holding up his iPhone 6. “But I was sketching a scenery last evening and caught something strange.”
He opened his gallery and zoomed into a distant figure: a man dragging what looked like Rani, heading toward the mango orchard.
“That’s Raju from Ramtek!” Appa shouted. “He had an eye on Rani during last year’s fair. I remember!”
Scene Four: The Heist Unfolds
A search party was organized, led by Appa, Savita Maushi, Panchu, and three kids with sticks (for moral support).
They reached the mango orchard where Raju from Ramtek was found sitting under a tree… milking Rani.
“I didn’t steal her!” he protested. “She followed me! I had jaggery in my pocket.”
“Do you think goats just follow anyone for jaggery?” Appa demanded.
“Well… yes,” Raju replied honestly. “They’re goats.”
The villagers were stunned. Was it really that simple?
Appa grabbed Rani’s rope and declared, “She’s coming home.”
But Rani refused to move.
“She doesn’t want to go!” Radha pointed out.
Turns out, Rani had fallen in love with one of Raju’s goats named Babloo. The village stood divided. Some demanded Rani’s return, others supported her right to choose.
“She’s not a piece of biryani,” shouted Radha. “She has feelings!”
Appa sat down under the tree, defeated.
Scene Five: The Final Twist
Just when things were heating up, a jeep screeched to a halt. Out stepped a young lady in jeans and sunglasses.
“Hi, I’m from Animal Rights Foundation. We received a tip about goat abuse.”
Everyone pointed at Appa.
“I loved her like my own daughter!” he protested.
“And you were going to eat her!” the activist replied.
“Only on special occasions!”
After an hour-long lecture and a few awkward selfies with Rani, the activist drove off, but not before filing a complaint and handing Appa a notice.
Appa had no choice but to abandon the biryani plans.
The Gav Daawat proceeded with vegetable pulao.
The villagers still danced and sang, but something was missing — the spice, the scandal… and the goat.
Epilogue
Rani now lives with Raju and Babloo, occasionally appearing on Instagram reels wearing sunglasses. Appa’s political ambitions took another hit but he found new fame as “The Man Who Almost Ate a Celebrity Goat.”
And somewhere deep in the village archive, Panchu’s CCTV sketch of Rani being kidnapped is preserved as “The Mona Lisa of Chikhalgaon.”
Moral of the Story:
Never underestimate a goat, a gossiping village, or the power of jaggery.
Receive Stories and Articles in your Inbox!
We won’t send any promotional or spam emails.
